You can pick your friends, but not your…landlord? In life there are countless people you will be forced to interact with regardless of how well (or how poorly) you jive with them. You might find this at your work place, family get-togethers or even your apartment complex. The bad news is that you can't change the person your landlord is, but the good news is that you can change the way you approach and react to landlord problems.

Typical Disputes

It's not uncommon for landlord problems to arise over the following issues:

• Repairs
• Discrimination
• Late Rent Payment(s)
• Housing Code
• Property Damage

Are You a Drama Queen?

Before placing the blame on your landlord, look inward—you might be surprised at what you find. Some individuals stir the pot and create un-needed drama in their lives without even realizing they're doing so. Michael J. Formica, M.S., M.A., Ed.M., a psychotherapist, suggests in his blog, Enlightened Living, that "If we are prone to create chaos for ourselves, the first thing to do around it is to look for patterns in our life around money, or relationships, or work, or school, or self-care or anything that goes off the rails—in a big or a little way—on a regular basis." Formica says that in order to break patterns one must "confront the place where we fall down," and to then use that awareness to break them.

Smile Your Way through Conflict

If a conflict with your landlord turns into a heated argument, think twice before shifting into a combative mode. Marsha Lucas, Ph.D., a psychologist and neuropsychologist says in her blog, Rewire Your Brain For Love, that "a calm state supports a connection with others. Being in this state allows for better health, growth and communication." Lucas suggests that you "Take a breath. Feel some compassion for yourself, smiling inwardly. Take another breath, and with compassion for the scared person standing across from you, smile outwardly."

Keep Anger at Bay

Since conflict resolution is your ultimate goal with your landlord, do everything you can to reach it. Relationship therapist, Dr. Jamie Turndorf, describes how to resolve conflict and steer away from anger in her blog, We Can Work It Out. Turndorf says that "it's common for people to ‘act out' angry feelings with hostile words (sarcasm, threats, yelling, name calling) or hostile behavior," and that you should "only say what you know will be helpful, beneficial and constructive not only to yourself, but also to the other party."

Be Cool

The use of common sense and responsible behavior can prevent conflicts with your landlord. Make sure you put into play the following actions:

• Pay rent on time, every time.
• Communicate any concerns you might have to your landlord.
• Don't violate the terms of lease.
• Take proper care of the property.
• Give ample notice when you decide to move. Most landlords request a 30-day notice to vacate.